Fitting in

Over the years, especially when younger, the biggest struggle is the one that got me into trouble, sometimes in the most unexpected ways. That struggle is one we know well, which is the attempts to fit in with the rest of the crowd. I was diagnosed at age 3 in 1989. Clear examples. Now that I’m 32, fitting in is no longer anything I desire to do. There’s several reasons for that. One of them being that I’ve been in the Security Profession for 14 years through multiple states, primarily California, Nevada, and North Carolina. In that time I’ve seen the good, the bad, and the downright insane. In Nevada, I worked both on and off the Las Vegas Strip depending on the job. I’ve seen the worst in people, and it’s turned me off to even trying to be like “most people”. Then there’s a simple fact of life that I’ve come to realize. It’s better to have very few people who will show up when you need it most, than to have many people who likely won’t be there when things turn sour. Ask me how I know that. Both of these things put together are why I couldn’t care less about fitting in. When people say things like “most people I know..............”, I look at them like they’ve gone and lost their minds. Most people may do something one way pal. There’s almost always multiple ways of achieving the same things. Most people do it the easy way, but here’s the deal. I’m not “most people”. Those of us on the Autism Spectrum and our families know it well.
  • Hi James. My grandson Dante is 12 and really struggling with his peers. I have raised him since birth and seen him come so far, but it's still very difficult for me to see him so upset. I keep reminding him to just be himself and he will get where he wants to be in his own way and in his own time. When I shared your email with him he said it helped him a lot & I visibly saw him relax and become less tense. Thank you for that! :)
  • Hi James. My grandson Dante is 12 and really struggling with his peers. I have raised him since birth and seen him come so far, but it's still very difficult for me to see him so upset. I keep reminding him to just be himself and he will get where he wants to be in his own way and in his own time. When I shared your email with him he said it helped him a lot & I visibly saw him relax and become less tense. Thank you for that! :)
  • In reply to Cindy Ritter:

    It took a while for me to come to that point. With the people I deal with at work, some days are a matter of what goes first. Me shaking my head no believing what was seen, or me smarting off because of how ridiculous things often get. Coworkers get a good show for either. Had a cop the other day tell me I should be a standup comedian. Sadly I’m not a comedian, but a smart-allic, and oh is there a difference.