Son wants a girlfriend

Hi all.  My son, HFA, is 28.   He has a job as a cashier, and got a drivers license last year.   He lives on his own in a apartment.  With all of this independence that he has achieved, his next goal is to have a relationship.  He has had several very successful “virtual” relationships, and then when they finally meet in person, it always ends with “I think we will just be friends.”   I don’t think that his being on the Spectrum is known until the in-person meeting, which always leads to heartbreak for him.   Our family will be moving to the Dallas area in a few months, and he will be coming in June, when his lease is up.   Is there a forum or dating app somewhere specifically for individuals who are looking for a romantic relationship?   Appreciative of any feedback.

  • This is not something you should be involved with.    If he wants relationships he needs to work on that himself.    He may be asd, but he is an adult and you need to respect that

  • What finally worked for me (this was before online dating- will be married 22 years this June) was to actually use my autism to be very direct and upfront about what I want, from the very first.  I used an introduction service called Together of Oregon, which was very much like some of the more serious dating apps, the ones where you fill out a personality compatibility quiz instead of merely swiping pictures.  I was specifically looking for marriage, I didn't know about my HFA at the time or I would have put it in there- and I was specifically looking for somebody interested in exploring the history of religion with me (my family has a tradition of converting our spouses to Roman Catholicism).  I brought all of that up on the first date, and married the sixth girl I was introduced to.

    I do believe there now is something similar specifically for autistics; it would be well worth looking into.